Week 6

Full of drama, heartbreak and plenty of man tears, I give this season's Hometown Date Night episode two roses up!

Gia and Bachelor Jake got things started in New York city where they first took a cuddle cruise to Ellis Island. En route to see Lady Liberty, Gia tries to impress Bachelor Jake with her sexy modeling skillz. I hope Gia's ancestors that left the old country and survived the trek across the Atlantic are super impressed with how their American dream has come to fruition. Normally on the Hometown Date Night episode we are taken to the family homestead for a slice of life glimpse at how these crazy broads were brought up. Mom usually greets the Bachelor with open arms while Dad not only grills some steaks, but the Bachelor as well. Since MTV was using casa de Gia to film season two of "The Jersey Shore," we instead meet Gia's family for a nice Italian dinner at a restaraunt. We are introduced to Mama Gia and step-dad Tony. But my favorite member of Gia's familia has to be her step-brother Erick. The gold chains, the diamond stud in his ear, those frosted tips! Have I just discovered our next Bachelor? "The Bachelor: Bada-Bing, Bada-Boom, Bada-Rose," coming this fall to ABC.

We then travel to Williamstown, MA to visit Ali's family. I hope the city of San Francisco has been alerted that it wasn't Ali's actual hometown. I wouldn't want riots to break out on Lombard street. After frolicking in the colorful New England foliage, Ali tells Bachelor Jake about her deceased grandmother. Instead of simply sharing sweet memories, Ali decides to take our Bachelor on a ghost tour of grandma's house because apparently Ali must get the approval from the other side before she'll let Bachelor Jake meet her living relatives. Well, Gram's must have liked what she saw floating above the heavens, because Bachelor Jake asked Ali's mom for permission to propose!

Next we travel across the country to the Pacific Northwest to visit with Tenley and her family in Oregon. Surprisingly, this was Bachelor Jake's first visit to the beaver state. Bachelor Jake, you're a pilot. Does Air Sixpack not fly into PDX? Before meeting the family, Tenley takes Bachelor Jake to a dance studio where she tells him that her ex-husband never appericated her passion for dancing and says,"I want to show you the dance that's in my soul." I'm sorry, but if I were Bachelor Jake, I don't know if I'd want to see the dance inside someone's soul. But, if he must - I'm glad it's the dance within Tenley's. I'd be afraid of the bump and grind booty dance that would probably emerge from Vienna's. After the private performance, we join Tenley's adorable family for dinner where we meet her parents Rob and Beth. We all know that Tenley is my top pick for our Bachelor, but I'm a tinge worried that going through a divorce and becoming a finalist on The Bachelor all in the same year maybe pushing Tenley's emotional envelope. But, maybe Momma beth knows best. She tells Bachelor Jake, "If anybody is ready, it's Tenley." Family night in Oregon concludes with Bachelor Jake and Father Rob in a tearful embrace as he tells our Bachelor, ''I feel like I could give my blessing for Tenley to be with a person like you.''

And then we head down to the wonderful state of Florida to spend time with Vienna, her family, and her hair extensions. Vienna welcomes Bachelor Jake to the sunshine state with a pontoon river cruise near where she grew up. Along the way they encounter turtles, aligators and the truth about Vienna's previous marriage. Turns out after a secret elopement, Mr. and Mrs. Hair Extentions were married a mere 10 months before calling it quits. But, she swears she has matured since then and is ready for the "real thing." Its been hard to escape Vienna for the past few weeks as her hair extenions have graced the cover of nearly every celebrity gossip mag at the check out counter. So, if by "matured" she means got a boob job and did some nude calendar modeling, the yes, she's definitely matured. Vienna's father Vince greets Bachelor Jake at the door holding a chiuaua. Forget get saw-offed shot guns to scare the boy diddling your daughter, this is effin' Florida where they'll sic a chiuaua on your ass if you get outta line with a princess like Vienna. Over a dinner of fried gator tail, Daddy Vince learns that his baby Vienna is ''falling hard'' for Bachelor Jake. So, like every good Amurican father he feels it's his duty to take the Bachelor out to the garage to lecture him about what he expects from a future son-in-law. ''I've always treated my daughter just like a princess. That's how I expect her to be treated." I especially liked how Bachelor Jake's accent goes a bit south as he agreed to treat precious Vienna like like princess she was raised to be. For some reason Bachelor Jake seemed to enjoy his time in Florida and I'm afraid that Princess River Rat may be among our final two.

After a whirlwind of hometown dates, Bachelor Jakes and the final four head back to their hotel in L.A. to prepare for the next rose ceremony. We catch up with Bachelor Jake challaxin' in his room when he gets a knock at the door. Now I had a few scenarios running through my mind when I heard the knock.

A.) A jilted Jillian coming to finally confess her true love for Jake and hatred for men named Ed that wear short shorts
B.) Chris Harrison stopping by with hookers and blow
Or
C.) One of the remaining four breaking it to the Bachelor that she must choose between him or her career

A crying mess of an Ali comes to tell Bachelor Jake that her job is in jeopardy if she continues with the show. Hoping that Bachelor Jake will put on a ring on it right then and there, Ali wants our Bachelor's input. He tells her, "I can't right now guarantee you that I'm going to put a ring on your finger, but I can't look you in the eye and tell you that I'm not going to." And with that Ali melts to the floor in a puddle of tears.

That night at the rose ceremony as Chris Harrison greets the ladies, Ali interrupts and asks for a moment alone with Bachelor Jake. Poor Chris Harrison hasn't been able to make it through an entire rose ceremony all season without some sort of dramatic interruption. He escorts Ali to the Bachelor's Quarters where the two instantly entagle themselves on the couch. Hoping he'll give her the Final Rose guarantee, Ali tells Bachelor Jake, ''I came into this with everything I wanted in life except for you and there's a chance I could leave it with nothing.'' But Bachelor Jake couldn't promise that she'd win the engagement ring or star in the upcoming two-hour Bachelor Wedding special during sweeps. So, Ali decides she can't stay and boards the reject limo where she instantlly begins questioning her decision.

And so we're down to three; Gia, Tenley and Vienna. Tune in next week as Bachelor Jake takes the trio on fantasy dates in St. Lucia. Can't wait to see who decides to "forgo" the fantasy suite. My guess it won't be Vienna. She's been dying for some of the Bachelor's sausage...